Today On The Rachel Maddow Show

NOTE: you can of course drink something non-alcoholic but if you do choose to go the booze route Rachel suggests beer or a half-strength high ball: one ounce of booze in an eight-ounce glass filled with ice and topped with seltzer.

drink once…

if mccain says:
prison
vietnam
table
chair

drink twice…

if mccain says “marie the flame of florida”

drink once if obama says…
anything about protecting main street and not just wall street

drink once if either candidate…
uses jim lehrer’s first name in an answer

drink once if obama…
uses the phrase mccain-bush or bush-mccain

drink once if mccain says…
my friends

drink twice if…
obama displays his most presidential ability — being able to do two things at once — by patting his head and rubbing his tummy at the same time

drink twice if…
anyone says “first dude”

drink twice if…
anyone’s cellphone goes off and it’s giuliani’s wife calling

drink once if…
obama references that in order to capture bin laden you have to go not to the gates of hell but rather to a country that rhymes with shmakisatan

drink everything in the house if…
governor palin shows up in mccain’s place

quit drinkin forever if…
mccain declares war on someone new (iraq, afghanistan, russia and iran don’t count since he’s already done the deed with them)

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